So, here it is, I think this is the ultimate post of this blog, I think this is what this blog is about!
So Last Saturday night I found myself at U2….they were amazing, but they didn’t preform my song… “stuck in the moment”… this has been my theme song for the last two years…yes, it is two years since my partner of 16, nearly 17 years told me he had never really taken it seriously and had fucked around.. I feel I can say that finally cos the girl he is with is so lovely and special that she won’t be hurt by me saying that and he really is so removed from the situation that he doesn’t care.
So how am I?
Well to cut a long story short I had my heart ripped out by the man I adored but it was the best thing that ever happened to me, I wound up with my lovely mad scientist partner and our perfect baby!
And my outcome, well it wound up being the U2 song stuck in the moment, I just felt that I knew lots of people who were “stuck”, that there was something that they just couldn’t or wouldn’t let go of, and now here I am trying to let it all go…..actually trying to convince everyone else that it’s ok to let it go!!!
I really do try to live in the moment, it is hard, today my partner and I drove by a certain place and we got into a discussion about the prson that my ex husband had the major affair with…..she is still happily married to her partner of the time…I never had the balls to make a scene, to tell her partner, to make him feel the pain I felt…
I just can’t, she knows I know, one of the decent things my ex did was tell her he had told me, but I haven’t seen her, and I hope I never will, I did see her a lot when they had the affair.. I was so stupid, I really didn’t see it, I just thought she didn’t like me, cos I can be shy.
My poor partner now ( I like to refer to him as my lover…tacky, I know) but he has to face 100 questions about any new student or girl he is working with…and he is currently a post doc, hoping to be a lecturer…imagine my stress.. I read a report which said university lecturers (male) had the highest level of divorce in the US, it’s a biological thing, even though they rarely gat to date a young (fertile) woman, they are surrounded by them… and leave their wives…
need I say more…..?
and he really is so removed from the situation that he doesn’t care.
It’s subtle… I can’t quite be sure … but you seem to be suggesting here, hinting, intimating… that someone has his head up his ass?
;D