You really don’t want to read this rant!

Ok, so I haven’t posted here ub a while, and on nine pounds since early on Saturday morning when I was shattered, I am still shattered, I’d forgotten I suppose how tired you are in the first trimester, and with three kids to run around after I am basically brain dead constantly, a simple question requiring a yes or no answer will throw me into a stupor!  I am up early in the morning, kids and I head to gym, we drop toddler into childcare and then swim for an hour, I am in the shallow end with my daughter so I am doing nothing strenuous but still that very gentle exercise is enough to wipe me out, after a shower the kids head to the adventure zone thing, where they run around for about 45 minutes giving me a chance to sit with my book and have a cup of tea and a scone!  We are home by 11:45 am, it feels like 2 am, I feed them, feed the baby, put him down for a nap and try to forgo my urge to clean and tidy and just lie down for an hour! Not that it has worked, kids pester me, in and out asking for the same thing over and over again in a Bart Simpson style…….

Today I flipped, I had gotten baby to sleep, I had fed the other two, swimming stuff in the machine being washed for tomorrow, I’d even done a grocery shop, had two chickens in the oven and I tried to lie down….after fifteen minutes I was just dropping off, in comes the ten year old, “can I go out to play?”, no, he’d been grounded for fighting with his sister, “then the back garden”, I said OK, but no screaming and shouting, fifteen minutes later I am just dropping off again and up comes his sister, looking for a treat!!! When she was dismissed I thought OK, fifteen minutes left,  she’s only down stairs five minutes when the two of them start screaming at each other!!

Downstairs like a bullet, I see the fear in their eyes when I enter the room, I ring their dad, tell him I am gonna call social services to take them away if they don’t stop fighting and hand my son the phone to talk to his dad!

Now Iam gonna be the mother of four in February,what will the rows be like, what does the future hold! I know I am a good mum, I am very sure of that but sometimes the relentless energy and selflessness required just seems all consuming and there is nothing left for me?


5 thoughts on “You really don’t want to read this rant!

  1. I DO.NOT.KNOW how you do it. I don’t know how any parent does it. I barely have enough energy to look after myself. When you are a parent (I speak from witnessing my own mother – also a mother of 4- for years) you are constantly on the go. Constantly at the beck and call of your kinds, their friends, their school, their extra-circular activities.

    I am far to selfish to ever become a parent.

  2. god that does sound like a bad day… i sympathise on the stupor thing, i’m the dullest i’ve been in my whole life! following a conversation at tea break is really exhausting, and i’ve had loads of people asking me ‘are you OK? are you tired?’ when they talk to me on the phone, i probably speak half as fast as usual.
    i’m quite apprehensive how i’ll cope with being at the beck and call of one, never mind 4! i tend to get a little tetchy and what’s the word, reproachful, if anybody puts more demands on me than i’m willing to cope with at any one time…

  3. Sounds like a really shitty day, So sorry for you. My mum had 5 and to this day I don’t know how the hell she did it. She was basically pregnant for 10 years(oldest was 10 when the youngest was born)

  4. Orela, my oldest will be just about to turn eleven when baby will be born…snap! Then I also will have two extra kids at weekend, my boyfriend will have his kids then! so six kids…two adults!
    Darren, I’m grand, it’s up and down, I had a nice week but so tiring, growing a baby is hard work!
    Péitseoga,You will be absolutely fine! YOu’ll have a beautiful baby and cherish that time, you will never get that time back and with your first you can really indulge, spend loads of time just enjoying baby!
    Liz, I just do it I suppose, helps that kids are amazing! Also I do get away for a few hours every now and again, helps!

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