Do I need to say anymore? My lovely sweet boyfriend (who I really don’t deserve) made me breakfast in bed this morning (yes they are superquinn sausages!) My old husband (is that better than EX?) has my kids, so it’s just been me, my boyfriend and his kids since yesterday evening, I’l be getting my guys at four today, so I have given my boyfriend some space, he had a “man night” with boys last night, pizza and the Blues Brothers, so I just stayed out of the way. I figure he needs one on one time with them to make them feel secure, so I just keep my head down, I also feel like if I avoid the kids I won’t get drawn into the situations that my boyfriend needs to be addressing. Easier said than done, last night I went to my neighbour for a cup of tea ( two hours, several cups of tea and a chocolate stirrer from M&S) and when I came back, while passing through the hall on my way to my room I asked the eight year old if he’d had a good night, I was ignored……which is not unusual, so I just feel totally hopeless, then I lay upstairs listening to my partner being bullied by his own son…….not good, I really am at a loss.
My gut instinct is to speak to everyone in a very respectful manner, even when I am discipline the kids I do try to be reasonable ( at times I fail miserably) and I had felt that the child would follow the example and speak respectfully to my partner (his dad) his brother, my kids and me, but that just doesn’t work, he just seems unaware of what is happening, he is a bully and I just can’t warm to him……that makes me feel really sad! So you see I really don’t deserve breakfast in bed! I did venture downstairs for about five minutes this morning, but I just couldn’t bite my tongue so I headed back upstairs, where I am now listening to the Republic of Loose on my stereo, really fucking loud, foul language blaring out…..hee hee like a fucking teenager! I am gonna try to do the blog post that has been brewing fro a while, but my brain is just fucked after all that meat!